It was January of 2019 that I finally followed through on my New Year’s Resolution: weight loss. I decided I would wholeheartedly commit, no excuses. And I did. But this isn’t a story of triumph, where an individual loses weight and gets their life together. At first, I thought so, but the reality is that, that resolution, the one I set every January 1st since the age of 11, just brought a lot of hunger, sadness, and empty promises.
Many have a story similar to mine. They are not all about weight-loss, but nearly all of them revolve around unrealistic goals we pressure ourselves to meet with little to no time. And this makes sense when we exist in a society that makes us feel that success, beauty, financial freedom, education, and so on, have time limits. But the reality is, the immense pressure we place on ourselves to achieve all the things nearly overnight is only discouraging and keeps us stuck.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to create goals that enhance your overall quality of life. However, it is time we redefine what these goals entail. I still make New Year’s Resolutions; I just operate with a different mindset
All of my goals revolve around these three points:
- I am enough as I am now.
- Instead of shrinking myself, I will focus on expanding my life.
- There is no failure, I just have yet to master this skill.
Next, I make sure my goals excite me, rather than burden me (aka goals I have set to keep others please, rather than support my own wants and needs). And finally, I make sure my goals are specific, sustainable, and can be built upon. I know this sounds like a lot of information to digest, but there are actually specific steps you can follow. It’s called S.M.A.R.T. goals, or specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound goals.
Remember, your resolution does not have to start off as a huge feat, but it can build up to one. For example, this year, my goal is to grow my business. To break this down into something that’s S.M.A.R.T, I am starting with something that feels more manageable:
S – I want to dedicate an hour a day, five days a week, over the next six weeks to creating content and connecting with community members to promote my business.
M – I will dedicate one hour every day, between 3:30 – 4:30 pm, to creating two written posts or one blog and responding to at least five dm’s and comments.
A – These are small steps I can take each day that do not just excite me but do not feel overwhelming. I have the time set aside to achieve this.
R – This goal is something I can build upon to further develop my business, as well as gives me practice in creating lasting relationships with people who really mean so much to me.
T – I have created three different measurements of time, so I have clear steps to follow and can consistently check-in with myself to reflect on my progress.
This is my goal, however, all goals are worthy, no matter how “small” they may seem. It was only two years ago that I started setting goals like, “leave bed for an hour once a day and use ten minutes of this time to step outside.” No matter where you are, you are never too far to get to where you want to be. Just don’t forget your worth is inherit and you deserve a life full of love and laughter no matter where you stand now.